


it's just sex

by musagetes



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Awkward Sexual Situations, Barebacking, Blow Jobs, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Facials, First Time, Hand Jobs, M/M, Mutual Masturbation, Oral Sex, Phone Sex, Sex Toys, Somnophilia, Unsafe Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-11-18
Updated: 2013-01-17
Packaged: 2017-11-18 22:16:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/565869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musagetes/pseuds/musagetes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Similarly to all complicated love stories, Zayn and Liam’s started with a wank. It was simple, really, just two really great friends casually having a wank next to one another. Who knew falling in love was much messier than the messes they produced in their post-orgasmic hazes?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, so, at the beginning of No Fap November, I just wanted to write a really long story that had a bunch of sex, sex, and more sex. Really, nothing but sex. So I decided that I'd write it and include various different kinks because why not? This isn't PWP - it actually has a theme I want it to go after.

Similarly to all complicated love stories, Zayn and Liam’s started with a wank. It was simple, really, just two really great friends casually having a wank next to one another.

They had just settled into their hotel rooms, having only just gotten back from a late night interview, and Zayn was _horny._ He couldn’t remember the last time he had a wank but he was desperate for one now.

Zayn needed to bust one and now. Unfortunately, Liam was in the shower, and Zayn groaned because Liam took the longest showers of them all -- Zayn’s neglected penis wouldn’t last that long.

But then again, _Liam took the longest showers._ Realization dawned on Zayn, and with a satisfied smirk he got off his bed, stripped down, and got his laptop before returning to his bed once more.

As soon as his desktop showed, he clicked open his internet browser, switched over to Private Browsing, and typed in his favorite porn site. He clicked the first category he saw, not caring what it was, all he wanted was to sit back and get off.

The video loaded and on screen a pretty little blonde was being slapped in the face with a large penis, before the blonde took it in to her mouth. Was shitty porn but Zayn was desperate, so he started wanking nonetheless.

He fast forwarded the video a bit until he found a part that had more action. The guy, a buff jock with an ass that put the girl’s to shame, had the blonde laid down on the bed as he thrust himself in and out of the woman’s pussy, his hands ravaging her body and gripping her tits before he brought his head down and sucked on her nipple.

Zayn grunted at the sight and started pumping his fist around his cock faster, his eyes glued to his laptop screen. He was so enraptured by the pornography that he hadn’t heard the shower turn off, or notice Liam step out and stare at Zayn curiously from the doorway of the bathroom.

Liam didn’t mind the fact Zayn was getting off in the slightest. He knew how Zayn was feeling, sexually frustrated and whatnot, and understood that they all needed to get one off once in a while, a chance they haven’t had in quite some time thanks to their constant touring and interviews. Liam felt a twinge of guilt that he had walked in on this, knowing that Zayn was probably counting on Liam to take one of his long showers like he normally did.

But damnit, Liam was horny, too, and if Zayn gets to bust a nut then why can’t Liam?

He made his intrusion known as he walked to his bed, hand going through his wet hair as his towel hugged his waist.

“Having fun?” Liam quipped, a smirk appearing on his lips as Zayn shot out of bed in fright of being caught.

“Li,” Zayn squealed, falling to the floor in embarrassment. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“What am _I_ doing?” Liam asked, laughing. “I think I should be asking you that, don’t you think?”

“Sod off,” Zayn glared, more of embarrassment than actual meaning.

Liam didn’t answer, simply laughed and made his way to Zayn’s bed and picked up the discarded laptop. The video was just ending, the jock having come all over the blonde’s face. Liam scrunched his nose is disgust.

“You get off to _this?_ ” Liam asked, disbelieving. For some reason, he couldn’t quite picture Zayn getting off to such poor pornography.

“I was horny, okay,” Zayn said, rising to his feet. He remained standing beside the bed, his hands awkwardly trying to cover his softening cock and balls.

Liam ignored him and decided to switch sites, visiting _his_ most frequented porn sites. Zayn, curious, moved to see what Liam was doing.

“You have a _membership?_ ” Zayn mocked, and Liam may have blushed had his blood not already been rushing down towards his penis in knowledge of what he was planning.

“I may have subscribed,” Liam mumbled, ignoring the insult, and continued to browse through his history until he found the video he marked for later of three Brazilians -- two guys ravaging one girl.

“Now this, this is porn,” Liam said before he held the laptop up and undid his towel, freeing his half-hard cock and letting it fall against his abs. Again, Zayn squeaked.

“What the hell!” Zayn cried out, disbelieving.

“What?” Liam asked back innocently as he began stroking his length. “How come you get to have a wank and I can’t?”

“I was doing it in _private,”_ Zayn tried reasoning, “and on _my_ own bed!”

Liam smirks at him before returning his attention to the laptop. “Whatever.”

He continued pumping his length, still a little moist from his shower, at the two guys taking the girl on screen. Liam really wanted to go to Brazil; all the girls seemed to be perfect there. Hell, all the guys were, too, but Liam only fapped over the girls.

Faintly, he heard Zayn’s sigh of defeat before he felt the bed dip and Zayn crawl his way in, sitting on the edge of the bed, not wanting to get too close to Liam, naked and wanking.

Liam rolled his eyes before looking at Zayn. “Just come on, Zee, it’s just a wank -- _relax.”_ To prove his point, or to simply emphasize how to relax, he returned his attention to the video again and jerked himself along to it as the two guys placed kisses along her naked body while fucking her on both ends.

Zayn gulped in nervousness before shyly making his way further onto the bed. Zayn was horny, so fucking horny, he couldn’t not fap. The laptop was position in a way that Zayn would have to be pressed against Liam’s side in order to get a proper view of the video.

Swallowing down the last of his nervousness, he let his sexual desires take over, and aligned himself by Liam’s side, their thighs and arms pressed together firmly. Zayn turned to look at Liam through his lashes, a blush on his cheeks that only intensified when Liam turned to smile happily at him.

With a wink, Liam turned and fapped along to the video, turning the volume up to help induce their orgasms. They were both well aware of the body pressed against themselves, of the additional moans and grunts filling the room, of Liam’s fast strokes against his plump, pink dick contrasting Zayn’s slower strokes against his darker length.

Zayn, having had a head start, was the first to come, his hips jutting up as his come shot from his dick, the sticky webs landing everywhere -- on Zayn’s arms, his chest, and embarrassingly enough, on the side of Liam’s face, from his jaw to his cheeks and even his hair.

Though Zayn had yet to finish coming, he was mortified. Even as he was riding his orgasm out, struggling to keep his eyes open, he found himself apologizing to the boy he just jizzed over.

“Fuck,” Zayn tried to say, a moan involuntarily slipping out along with it as he continued coming. “Shit, sorry.”

Liam was surprised, to say the least, when he felt his face get hot and wet and sticky. The fact that Zayn was coming on him was enough to send Liam over the edge, a kink Liam didn’t know he was in to, but he ended up coming while Zayn was trying to apologizing.

Once Liam started coming, Zayn shut up and just watched, listened as Liam tried to catch his breath and waited to be bitched out.

“I think,” Liam started, inhaling the breath that Zayn was holding in nervously, “that I’ll need another shower.”

Zayn exhaled incredulously, not sure he heard right.

“Li, I’m so fucking sorry,” he stammered. Liam turned and smiled at him, the come on his face smearing against the bedspread.

“It’s okay,” he whispered, shrugging and still grinning. “Wasn’t your fault.”

“Still --” Zayn tried to argue, but Liam hushed him.

“Wasn’t your fault,” he repeated, more firm, before softening as he added, “just try to aim somewhere else next time, yeah?”

Zayn gulped. “Next time?”

“Maybe,” Liam smiled again, before getting up off the bed and making his way to the bathroom to clean himself off.

Liam most certainly did not think about tasting Zayn’s come on his face, nor did he think about Zayn while having another fap in the shower, and Zayn definitely didn’t have another fap thinking about shooting his load all over his best friend Liam’s pretty little face again before drifting to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it. :) Anyway -- as I said at the beginning, I want to try and include various different kinks, so if you have one you'd like me to include at a future point, leave a comment saying/explaining your kink(s). Alternatively, you can message it to me on **[tumblr](http://xprdc.tumblr.com/)**.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam and Zayn continue their sexual activities, advancing them to handjobs. As it turns out, Zayn's innocent Liam is an excellent teacher.

It was simple. Awkward, but simple.

Zayn and Liam continued to room together when they had a chance, and each time, they had a wank together.

While Zayn remained shy about it all, Liam wanked confidently, as if he was boasting his long length with pride. It was always Liam that initiated their masturbation sessions. Usually, Zayn would simply walk into the room or out of the bathroom from his shower to find Liam laying in his bed, fly open as he stroked his cock casually. Sometimes Liam would offer Zayn a smirk, others he’d simply have his eyes glued to the t.v. screen where a nameless pornography was playing.

Then Zayn would join in slowly, quite shyly, still unsure of it all. He knew that these things were normal among young teenage boys, but not all of them were as close as he was with Liam. Not only that, they both had girlfriends.

Liam didn’t seem to share Zayn’s worries. Instead, he had replied, his cock still in hand, that they were just two friends having a casual wank, it didn’t mean anything unless it _meant_ something to one of them.

And it didn’t, Zayn decided, because it really was just a wank, even if Zayn wanted to come all over Liam’s face again.

Still, after a long day of performing and interviews and many screaming fans, plus the pent up sexual frustration of being apart from his girlfriend for too long (not that she was even putting out, the prude), he couldn’t find a better way to relieve himself of stress than to indulge in a nightly wank.

“You wank wrong,” Liam commented, pulling Zayn out of his thoughts. Zayn’s hand stilled mid-stroke.

“Huh?” Zayn asked, eyes cocked in confusion because really, is there a right way to wank? “What do you mean, ‘I wank wrong’?”

“Well, not wrong, I guess,” Liam corrected, his eyes still directed at Zayn’s darker cock. “Just weird.”

Zayn scrunched his nose. “Weird?”

“Yeah,” Liam nodded.

“How is it weird?”

“It’s just like… boring,” Liam explained.

“Boring, what? How is it boring? I come before you do!”

“That’s because I let you,” Liam chuckled, smirking slyly.

“What do you mean you let me?” Zayn asked, taken aback at the admission.

“I don’t wanna be the first to come,” Liam shrugged. “I hold back, but I wank much better than you do.”

“What makes you say that?”

Liam grinned dirtily in response. “Watch.”

So Zayn did, as Liam resumed wanking on the other bed, though he didn’t understand how Liam was doing anything differently until the other boy pointed it out to him.

“There’s like different techniques you can use to make it more interesting, more stimulating and all that. It helps make it feel better. You just go up and down and honestly I don’t know how you get off like that, especially with how big you are…”

Zayn blushed at that but he continued to watch as Liam stroked himself, trying to pinpoint how they wanked differently.

“Now watch this,” he instructed. “See my hand? Watch how I flick my wrist once it comes to the top.”

“Oh,” Zayn said, watching as Liam did just that, his arse lifting off the bed a bit as he cupped his palm around the head of his cock before his hand made its way back down his shaft.

“There’s a whole bunch of different techniques you can use,” Liam said, switching his hands to fap with his left and cradle his balls with his right. “Like using your other hand. It’s a bit hard at first but once you get used to it it’s bloody fantastic. If you do that, though, start with both hands until your weaker one becomes used to the exertions.”

Zayn nodded at the advice, attempting to mimic Liam’s actions.

“Also, your penis really isn’t the only thing to focus on if you want a proper wank. You’ve got your balls, too,” Liam said as he gripped them tightly, tugging them away. “A squeeze or just fondling them, doesn’t matter, feels fucking fantastic.”

“What else?” Zayn asked, cupping his own balls the way Liam was doing. Liam smirked.

“I know it may sound gay, but some guys like to finger themselves. I haven’t done it yet, but the guys that have, straight guys even, say it’s the best, cause of your prostate and all that. There’s also like other materials you can use.”

“Like what?”

“Toys, for starters. Maybe a fleshlight. You just slide your cock in there and fuck into it, really. You can get one after a vagina or an ass or a mouth and it’s supposed to make it feel like the actual thing, all tight and shit. There are cockrings, which are supposed to make you last longer, not letting you come. I read that some people use household stuff. Apparently it’s really good to fap with honey or jam and then just sit and relax once you’re done, letting it dry. Not sure how I feel about that one, though.”

After a moment of silence, save some shushed whimpers and moans, Zayn wondered how the hell his best friend knew so much about all this. Liam always seemed so innocent and puppy like yet here he was, explaining sexual activities as if it were his day job.

“How do you know so much about this?”

Liam offered him a toothy grin. “I can’t make pleasuring myself a bit more interesting?”

“No, I don’t mean that, I just…” Zayn said, trailing off, unsure as how to continue.

“Chill, mate, I get what you mean,” Liam said. “When Andy and I did this --”

“You wanked with Andy?” Zayn interrupted instantly. Liam quirked a brow in amusement.

“Yes; problem?”

“No… No, not at all,” Zayn mumbled, offering a weak smile. Of course there was no problem. It’s not like he found himself inexplicably jealous of the fact that Liam had wanked with someone other than himself, or that he had assumed Liam was just as new to this as he was, or even fancied the idea that their masturbation sessions were personal between the two of them, bonding in ways they don’t with anyone else because they trust one another that much. No, no problem at all.

Liam accepted the lie, grinning knowingly. “When Andy and I did this, I noticed he wanked differently, and I dunno, I thought I was doing it wrong so I decided to look it up and found there were different techniques and all that and yeah, I’ve sort of experimented on a few of them.”

At that, Zayn let the conversation die, not feeling the need to continue it. Instead, he tried to match Liam’s actions, but struggled with flicking his wrist at the top. Annoyed, he groaned in frustration.

“You’re doing it wrong,” Liam commented a few moments later, chancing a glance at Zayn’s progress.

“I can’t do it,” Zayn huffed in complaint. Feeling defeated, he let his hands fall as his hard cock stayed upright, angling to the side as it softened. Zayn closed his eyes in agony at the fact that he couldn’t pleasure himself as well as Liam did, only opening them when he felt a familiar hand, though one not familiar in _that_ general area, wrap around his now half-hard cock.

Zayn instantly opened his eyes and his mouth to protest but then he felt Liam’s wrist flick at the knob of his cock and Liam’s palm rub over the head and _oh, so that’s how it’s done._

“Fuck,” Zayn panted, rising to sit up instantly, his arms stretched to hold his weight up. Liam smirked at the expletive and took it as cue to continue, letting his hand travel from the base of Zayn’s cock before smoothly sliding upward, flicking his wrist and palming the head before making his way back down.

In just a dozen strokes, Liam had Zayn panting furiously, and Liam watched as Zayn’s stomach scrunched and relaxed with every breath and stroke. Zayn’s toes were curling and his hands were clenching against the bedspread and Liam was sure Zayn was close.

Wanting to give his best friend a bit more to get off to, he took his free hand and grasped Zayn’s balls, tugging them slightly as if to milk out the very obscene moan that came with the contact.

With just a few more tugs and strokes, Zayn was coming into Liam’s hand, but it only spurred Liam on to pump even more, faster than before, rubbing his palm over the head of Zayn’s gushing cock and spreading the come back down all over Zayn’s dark length.

Once Zayn tried to ease his cock free of Liam’s hand, his cock oversensitive within Liam’s rough grip, Liam took his come-covered hand and brought it to his own cock, instantly stroking himself on the floor next to Zayn’s bed.

Zayn was fascinated over Liam using his come to lather and lubricate his cock. Had his dick not been so beaten he would’ve had another go; just the sight of Liam using his come was making him horny all over.

Liam was emptying his release just a minute after, his come shooting white ribbons against Zayn’s bedspread. After milking it out, Liam dropped his head down on the bed, against Zayn’s arm. Zayn raised his other arm and carded his hand through Liam’s hair, petting him affectionately for giving him such an amazing orgasm.

“So what else can you teach me?” Zayn asked.

Liam raised his head and gave the dirtiest grin ever seen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah, as I said, I'm writing about various different kinks. If you'd like to have yours included in this, tell me here or on my **[tumblr](http://xprdc.tumblr.com)**. If I use it, I'll dedicate that chapter to you :P.
> 
> (: Hope you enjoyed it; leave a comment xx


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam has a toy and Zayn decides to try it out. A messy blowjob and an even messier facial ensues. In the end, Zayn wants his own toy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank G-d for friends who own fleshlights. Without them, I'd never know what one of these are like.
> 
> This, also, is the first 1D work I believe exists of a fleshlight kink, so yeah...

If Zayn stopped and thought about everything, he’d think the things him and Liam were frequently doing was anything but friendly. Sure, it started off as casual friends wanking, but now all Zayn could think about is sweat, come, balls, cocks, _sex._ More specifically, all he could think about was Liam’s sweat, come, balls, and cock and what _he_ would be like in sex.

Not that Zayn was wondering what it’d be like to fuck Liam, or be fucked by Liam, because he wasn’t. Instead, he’d simply wonder how Liam’s body would react, all sweaty and focused, as Liam explored pleasures with someone else. Would Liam be lithe muscles and soft touches, or rough, fast and furious?

The problem was, Zayn was now always stopping and thinking such thoughts. He didn’t even have to stop, he’d think them in passing. When Liam would hold his microphone by his side, letting it hang loose by his waist, he couldn’t help but think about the way just last night, Liam held his dick in the same manner. Or the way Liam would do his little power thrust dance move during concerts, or when Liam’s breath would be haggard and he’d return to their hotel room all sweaty from an intense workout.

But those was okay, those dirty, yet confusing, thoughts he entertained. Because when the thoughts became too powerful, usually as soon as Liam would enter their room all sweaty from his workout or wet from his shower, he’d put those thoughts aside and focus on whichever pornography they were going to get off to that night.

It worked until Liam brought out a fleshlight. They had talked about it before, and Liam had even shown him one online, but he didn’t know Liam actually went and bought one.

But there it was, in Liam’s hands wrapped around his dick and Liam looked like he was simply loving it. By the moans Liam was producing, Zayn wasn’t that surprised when Liam came first.

Liam laid there, looking defeated, purely exhausted and fucked out. It amused Zayn to see him like that, all sprawled out on Liam’s bed, all long legs, sweat and come covering his slim muscled body. He watched as Liam eased his cock out of the fleshlight, all red and abused, already softened. Without a word, Liam got up and made his way to the bathroom, towel in hand and a minute later, the shower was running.

Zayn wouldn’t be able to tell you what he was thinking when he made his way to Liam’s bed and picked up the used fleshlight, because he wasn’t. He just had an _urge_ and responded to it immediately, without hesitation or care that perhaps maybe they did have limits, and using your friend’s dirty fleshlight was pushing those boundaries. But again, he wasn’t thinking, at least not coherently, because Liam looked so pleasured and came loads and Zayn just _had_ to try it.

So he did.

He inspected the fleshlight for the hole, noticing the toy was a replica of a mouth, with Liam’s come sliding down. He brought it to his cock and eased himself in, the lubrication Liam added earlier mixed with Liam’s wet hot come making it slide in easy. Zayn couldn’t hold back the moan even if he tried.

It was so hot, from the lube or Liam’s come, Zayn couldn’t tell; didn’t even _care._ It just felt so damn _good_. The toy was tight around his cock, the lube and come making it both hot and wet and messy all over. His cock was throbbing inside the fake mouth, and it was all so wrong and inappropriate and it just made it that much better -- he wasn’t going to last.

He was able to manage a few good strokes before the bathroom door opened again and Liam stepped out. The boys’ eyes connected and Zayn just lost it, moaning Liam’s name as the toy milked his release out, his come adding to Liam’s, the toy smearing it all along Zayn’s cock.

Zayn was panting heavily, still in his post-orgasmic haze, his eyes too heavy to keep open. He felt amazing, and did not regret a thing.

Liam was smirking, seeing Zayn all stretched out over his bed, with his toy around his friend’s cock, all dirty and used. He walked over to the bed, climbed on, chucking at how Zayn was too fucked out to respond to the movements.

Boldly, Liam pushed Zayn’s hands away and took the fleshlight in his own. Zayn let out a whimper as Liam removed the toy. When his cock was free it look raw and flushed, covered in come. Liam took in the sight, realized that there was no way Zayn could have that much come covering his cock when he’s never came that much before. He inspected his toy before addressing Zayn curiously.

“Did you clean this before you used it?”

Zayn was still on cloud nine, replying with a shameless no. Liam smiled at the response, and a second later Zayn felt soft callused hands grasp his slick cock before it entered yet another hole, this one much tighter, wetter, and hotter than before.

Liam was sucking him off.

Zayn cried out helplessly, his already aching cock being relaxed by Liam’s firm tongue. Liam was sucking around the head, taking Zayn’s cock further into his mouth experimentally, testing his limits. All the while, Liam’s tongue was lapping up all of the come collected on Zayn’s cock, swallowing it down along with Zayn’s dick.

Zayn tried rutting his hips up but he was pinned down by the firm grasp Liam had on his hips. Taking the hint, Liam tried to take more in, going so far down on Zayn that his nose was pressed into Zayn’s pubes, his lips stretched around the base. Zayn’s cock twitched in the back of Liam’s throat, making him falter just a bit, and he pulled off a moment later, a pop sounding throughout the room.

Liam studied Zayn’s cock for a moment. “All clean,” he announced happily, and Zayn let out the saddest little moan in response.

“Don’t -- don’t stop,” Zayn stuttered. “ _Please,_ ” he added, for good measure.

Zayn felt Liam’s smile wrapped around his dick as Liam went down on him again, sucking tightly around his cock. This time, Liam held his hand around the base of Zayn’s dick while he focused on the head, swirling his tongue along the top and licked at the slit. When he grazed his teeth gently around it, Zayn knew he was close.

“Liam, I’m -- I’m gonna,” Zayn said in between his panting. Liam knew what he was going to say and tried to suck more fervently, but Zayn had other ideas as to how to finish, though the fact that Liam was willing to swallow his load made Zayn hope for a next time. He tugged at Liam’s hair roughly to get him to let up. “No, not like that.”

Liam slowed his sucking, humming around Zayn’s dick to show his acknowledgment, waiting for Zayn to go on.

“Do you think -- may I,” he stammered, before deciding the hell with it; they’re too far past niceties at this point. More confidently, and with as much as a straight voice as he could manage in between his pants and moans, he said, “I want to come on your face.”

Zayn most certainly did not miss the way Liam whimpered at Zayn’s request, or how his hand tightened just a bit more. He pulled off, though, rather eagerly, and started stroking Zayn’s length to get the facial he seemed to want just as much.

Liam jerked him furiously, impatiently, without finesse, and it hurt so much with Zayn’s oversensitive cock but he was coming all the same. Liam brought his face closer, pulling Zayn’s cock at an angle to point it at his face, and Zayn was coming all over him, shooting white hot ribbons along Liam’s flushed face. He had to close his eyes before he was shot with a particularly large glob. His eyes closed, he continued stroking Zayn out, pulling all that would come from the wrecked boy below him.

Once it was over, he had Zayn’s sticky hot come all over his face, in his hair, along his eyebrows and eyelids, his nose and all over his cheeks and lips. He even felt some sliding along his jawline, slipping down his nick.

When he opened his mouth, it became flooded with Zayn’s come. He swallowed it, willingly, licking his lips to gather what he could, relishing in the sweetly salty taste that Zayn offered.

He got up and laid down next to Zayn, who turned and looked at him with dark, half-lidded eyes. Liam took the discarded fleshlight and inserted his own cock in it, his eyes rolling back at the felling of his come mixed with Zayn’s. It didn’t take long for him to near his release, so he pulled the toy off quickly before replacing it with his hands and milked out his release, his come painting his chest, neck, and face.

Once they were both done from their second orgasms of the night, they laid there, silently, both struggling to catch their breaths. A lot was going through both boys’ minds, from how hot all that was to what else they’d like to do; how their girlfriends would react or the rest of the boys; have they crossed the point of no return and should they stop while they’re ahead. But mostly how hot it was and what they could do next.

When Zayn had managed to catch his breath, he turned to look at Liam, all exhausted and covered in come. In _both_ of their come. His cock twitched at the sight of Liam’s pretty face covered in his come.

“Li, you’re a mess,” Zayn chuckled.

Liam grinned back at the comment. “You think?”

“I feel like I’ve painted a masterpiece with my cock.”

“Mmm,” Liam hummed. “It definitely wasn’t that bad.”

Zayn didn’t know how to interpret the comment, as ominous as it was. It could have meant a lot of things, but at the moment, Zayn didn’t want to think too heavily into it, in fear of assuming incorrectly.

Instead, he said, “You have got to get me one of those toys.”

“I know just the one,” Liam grinned with a wink, before tossing the toy at Zayn and making his way to the shower once more.

Zayn didn’t say it, but he was rather quite excited, even though he knew his mind would torture him with thoughts and anticipation as to just what Liam had in mind.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Liam gives Zayn a very naughty present during Christmas dinner, via text message.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is not the original chapter I had planned, but after learning that Perrie and her mom are with Zayn and his family during Christmas, I had to change it, and thus jealous!Liam is here! Enjoy, and Merry Christmas to you all, you dirty little fuckers x (:

It had only been three days since he last saw Liam that he got the phone call, three days since he last shared a room and an orgasm with his best friend.

Three days too many, considering the longest they’d gone without since the beginning had been no more than a day.

But it was the holidays, after all, and Zayn should really stop thinking about all of this stuff since he’s with his family and _girlfriend_ at the moment.

It was fun, being around his family again, and it was a distraction from the confusion of whatever he has with Liam at the moment. He laughs, makes merry, eats, and chokes on his chicken when he gets a text from Liam during Christmas dinner.

**leeyum:** _zaynnnn im hrny hlp me pls x_

Zayn choked on his swallow, nearly sputtering the water he tried washing down when he read the next one.

**leeyum:** _p.s happy xxxmas ;) i got u a prezzie :))_

Attached to the last text was a picture, and Zayn thumbed it open cautiously, revealing Liam’s erect cock, a bow pressed nicely against the head. Zayn’s eyes bulged out and he dropped his glass of water, spilling its contents all over himself. All eyes of his family and girlfriend turn to him.

“Zayn, honey, is everything okay?” his mother asked, concerned.

“Uhm, yeah, no, uhm,” he stammered out embarrassedly, already aware of the flush of his cheeks. “I, uh, I’m fine, I just need a moment? Yeah, I need a moment, yeah…” he said, rising hastily from his chair to clean himself up. “I’m just gonna--”

“Go clean up?” his mother offered, after Zayn’s sentence trailed off.

“What?” He asks, confused for a moment, then _right._ “Oh, yeah, sure, clean up. Yeah, I’m gonna go clean up. I’ll be right back.”

He well aware that he’s nothing but a blabbering mess that doesn’t make sense as all of his family and Perrie stares at him with mixed expressions of caution and amusement, but all he can think about is the picture of Liam’s dick, wrapped tightly within his hand. After nodding like an idiot for half a minute after that, he leaves, heading straight to the upstairs bathroom, locking the door, and making his way to the shower tub where he promptly crawls in and sits down, pulling the shower curtain shut for good measure.

With shaky hands, he dials Liam’s number, faintly wondering why he always prefers to type his full number out manually than click the suggestion after three numbers. Impatiently waiting after three rings, he instantly jumps into conversation as soon as Liam picks up.

“Liam, what the hell!” he whisper-shouts, wrapping his knees between his arms and against his chest, using his free hand to pinch the bridge of his nose as he closes his eyes in what he can only describe as an image of pure distress.

“ _What?”_ Liam’s voice asks innocently, and Zayn can imagine Liam batting his eyelashes against his puppy-brown eyes.

“You _know_ what,” Zayn hisses into the receiver. “Your fucking _Christmas present!”_

“ _Oh,_ that! _Did you like it?_ ” Liam asks, and Zayn can literally hear Liam smiling genuine and bright and completely mischievous. Liam must take Zayn’s huff of breath as an agreement because he continues on, “ _Well that’s a relief. I wasn’t sure if I should have done the whole “dick-in-a-box” kind of thing, but I figured it’d be cooler if I just put a bow on it. Looked cuter, and so much easier.”_

“ _Liam!_ I am _not_ talking about your dick with you!” Zayn cries helplessly. “Well, I am, actually, but not because of that! You can’t just send me those, man. I was in the middle of Christmas dinner!”

“ _So,”_ Liam says coyly, taking a moment of consideration. “ _If I sent it after, say around dessert time, you wouldn’t have minded?”_

“Fuck, Liam,” Zayn says, then admits defeats because it’s clear there is no way he’ll be able to reason with Liam tonight. “You know I love you, mate, but what do you want?”

“ _I’m horny,”_ Liam answers casually, as if it were the simplest answer to the most normal conversation ever.

“And what did you expect me to do about that, Liam?”

“ _Well, aren’t you horny?”_ Liam asks, sounding genuinely confused for the first time during their whole conversation, and damn him, because of course Zayn’s horny. His dick hasn’t softened since the picture displayed on his phone, and he hasn’t gotten off since --

“ _You are!”_ Liam says, taking his prolonged silence as an answer.

“Fine, yes, I am,” Zayn admits with a sigh. “I haven’t wanked since the plane back.”

“ _You mean, since I jerked you off under my blanket?”_ Liam asks, clearly smiling.

“Yes,” Zayn says through gritted teeth. It isn’t like he hasn’t tried to wank since then, because he has, it’s just it felt awkward without Liam there with him, and there’s no way he was going to admit that.

“ _I like touching your dick,”_ Liam says right after. “ _It’s soft and feels nice in my hand, better than my own, even, which I’m quite jealous of, I’ll have you know.”_

Zayn grins despite himself, because only Liam would be jealous of how good someone else’s penis feels in his hand.

“ _I also like it in my mouth,”_ Liam continues, and Zayn hopes he didn’t hear him whimper. “ _I like how it tastes. A bit salty, but then… you? I don’t know, but it’s great. And it’s all heavy on my tongue, or pressing back against my throat. Mmm.”_

Yeah, no, his pants are way too tight for this, and that’s okay because you’re supposed to be naked in the shower anyway, right? Right, so he’ll just take his pants off then and maybe palm himself just because, definitely not because Liam is responsible for the constant throbbing going on down there.

“ _And then when you come on me?”_ Zayn can’t help the strangled groan he makes at that, clearly audible, as he tightens his hand around the head of his cock. “ _That’s so hot. Either on my face, sticking to my hair, or in my mouth and down my throat._ God, _I_ love _it when you come in my mouth, all hot and sticky and sweet. How come yours is so sweet? I think mine’s all salty.”_

And fuck, the image of Liam tasting his own come and comparing it to Zayn’s own is too much for Zayn to not do anything about, and so he starts jerking himself along to Liam’s obscenely dirty compliments.

The confines of the tub leave him cramped, jerking himself at an awkward angle as he attempts to keep the phone nudged against his ears while his feet slide up and down the tub. He’s thrusting his hips up against his hands, begging for the friction that Liam had created all those times before.

“ _I wonder if you’d like it, though,”_ Liam asks absently. “ _Are you a spitter or a swallower, Zayn?”_ And fuck, Zayn is nowhere near coherent enough to answer that, among any other questions. He wants to say neither, he’s not gay, but then he reminds himself he’s beating his meat to his best friend’s fantasies, his best friend who he’s shared plenty of not-so-straight orgasms with.

So instead of answering properly, he moans, and Liam seems content with the answer enough as he just chuckles, deep and throaty, only making Zayn’s dick twitch harder and he just wants to shut Liam up by filling his mouth with his dick, just like Liam seems to like.

“ _I think spitting is rude,”_ Liam says, conversationally, as if he’s not aware of the shaky breaths Zayn’s breathing into the receiver, or of the many moans filling the silence. Either that, or he’s pretending not to notice, the bastard. “ _If you let them come in your mouth then it’s only polite to swallow. But like, if they didn’t warn you, then I guess it’s only fair to spit, because it wasn’t your choice. You gave me forewarning, though.”_

Zayn moans even more at that, the confession that Liam was willing and ready to swallow his seed. He can feel his stomach burning and he’s very close to release, panting and squirming and curling his toes.

“ _So then, like, if you let them come in your mouth, you gotta be the responsible one and lick it clean for them. Oh, that’s another thing I like, cause it feels all weird but when I keep sucking you off well after you finish coming, when your dick is softening in my mouth, and you just squirm because you’re so oversensitive.”_

“Oh, fuck, _Liam,_ ” Zayn cries out into the receiver, and with one final, tight tug and twist around the top, he’s coming into his hand, milking himself for all he’s worth, enjoying the haze that three day’s abstinence has brought him.

After a minute of fatigued bliss, he comes back to his senses, hearing Liam call his name through the receiver. Tiredly, he gathers his phone and answers, his voice rough and deep and sounded fucked out.

“Yeah?”

“ _Hey, so yeah, I gotta run, Christmas dinner and all that, but yeah, Merry Christmas, Zayn, hope you have a good one!”_

And with that, Liam hangs up, leaving Zayn in a mess of his own come and racing thoughts. He cleans himself up, and makes his way downstairs into the dining room where Christmas dinner is carrying on. Zayn feels his phone vibrate in notification of a new text message as he seats himself. He checks it, and frowns.

“What is it, honey?” his mother asks.

“Nothing,” Zayn lies. “It’s Liam, he wishes us all a Merry Christmas, and asked me to tell Perrie hello.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zayn and Liam decide to bring in the new year with a bang... literally!

2012 had been a massively successful year, Zayn thinks as he nurses a Coke. He and the band had won several awards, played for the Queen, had a sold out concert at The Garden. Yeah, definitely not a bad year, and with only an hour left, Zayn can’t help but wonder what the next might bring.

Thankfully, or not due to the sly grin on Liam’s face that Zayn has recently learned to associate as mischievously sexual, Liam already seems to have something in mind.

After the Christmas debacle, Zayn had been left dumbfounded of Liam’s intentions. He hadn’t told him Perrie was with him or that she was even joining him for the Christmas holiday, so he’s not quite sure how Liam found out about that, or why it even mattered. When he did finally reunite with Liam to try and get answers, Liam, the smug bastard that he now is, played innocent with a teasing grin and a much guilty glint in his eyes that Zayn couldn’t decipher for the life of him.

They hadn’t done anything since the night of their unholy phone sex during Christmas dinner, and while Liam may not be willing to talk about it, it’s all Zayn can think of. Not just the phone sex, but their entire situation in general. He’s so confused about it all that he doesn’t even know how to properly label it anything other than ‘the situation’. At nights when he lies in bed awake at night (refusing to beat himself off because he _knows_ that if he does, he’ll think of Liam, and he knows this because he’s tried and he still can’t decide if that’s something to be proud of or not), trying to think of anything other than Liam or Liam’s mouth or Liam’s lips or Liam’s dick or… The problem is, the more he tries _not_ to think about the other male, the more he ends up doing just the opposite.

So, at night, when he should be sleeping peacefully, he’s wondering about him and Liam and how they ended up where they are now (wherever that may be, Zayn is still unsure of), and what that means for their relationship now. Then he’ll immediately frown, chastising himself for considering what he has with Liam as a ‘relationship’ when it’s just a friendship. He’ll be so lost in thoughts that when he does finally succumb to a deep sleep, it’s made peaceful by the endless and vivid sex dreams he has about Liam. When he wakes up, his bed wet and sticky from a release he couldn’t control in his sleep (though he’s certain had the dreams been true, the results would be the same), he gets annoyed with himself because sex dreams of your best _friend_ should not be considered peaceful, but _distressing,_ considering how much he’s stressed over them lately.

All Zayn’s been able to conclude is that, prior to whatever he and Liam are now doing, he was sexually frustrated for whatever reasons. Now, he’s sexually frustrated for one reason and one alone, and that reason is Liam.

But, thankfully, he has managed to _not_ think about that so far today, too busy buzzing with excitement over their success this year and the anticipation of what is to come during the next to worry about his obscenely complicated sex life, which is why he’s immediately caught off guard with Liam’s impromptu suggestion.

“I want you to fuck me,” Liam says, ever-so-casually, as he, too, nurses his own cola. The informality of his statement stuns Zayn into silence nearly as much as the statement, as Liam’s just looking out over the balcony, not even paying any attention to Zayn. Zayn doesn’t know how to feel about that, so he decides to seethe inwardly.

“You--you _what?”_ Zayn manages to ask, once he’s had near enough time to process Liam’s craziness. This time, Liam does turn to look at Zayn, and Zayn immediately prefers it the other way, because he just knows if he has to look in to Liam’s puppy dog eyes which he’s never been one to deny, and find them as dark as they are now, as dark as they are when Liam’s lips are wrapped around Zayn’s dick, then Zayn knows he’s going to give in. Damn Liam.

“I want you to fuck me,” Liam repeats, in the same casual voice, and Zayn can hear the seriousness in his voice, as well as see it in his eyes.  Zayn stares at him, jaw hanging loose, before he’s able to comprehend the various thoughts speeding through his mind at illegal limits.

“Why can’t you ask your _girlfriend?!_ ” is all Zayn can manage.

Liam rolls his eyes with a shrug of his shoulders. “Because she’s my _girl_ friend. She can’t fuck me.”

And oh, okay, Zayn gets that, but, “Why do you want to be _fucked?”_ Zayn cries in wonder, before realizing how insensitive he sounds and quickly adding, “Li, are you gay?” Really, it would explain Liam’s willingness and readiness for all of their sexual escapades, and Liam’s natural pro-like experience sucking him off.

“No,” Liam says, and Zayn can tell it isn’t a denial, that he means it honestly, but that just doesn’t make sense to Zayn, really. “It’s just, Dani and I, we’ve tried? Well, not have her fuck me, but we almost did. I almost did _her._ ”

“Okay, then what do you need me for?” Zayn asks curiously, not following Liam’s logic.

“Well, as soon as my pants were off and my cock was out, she screamed and told me to put it away. I wasn’t even half hard, Zayn!” Liam cries in frustration. Despite the situation, Zayn can’t help the chuckle that escapes his lips. Liam glares coldly at him.

“Sorry, it’s just, Li, you have to admit, that’s pretty funny,” Zayn jokes, still laughing. Trust Liam that he’d consider his blessing of endowment a curse.

“No, it’s not,” Liam grunts in annoyance. “My own girlfriend won’t have sex with me because she’ll think I’ll be too rough on her.” Zayn raises a questionable eyebrow at that, and Liam’s quick to wipe it off. “Piss off, Zayn; I can be gentle. The point is, I’m so horny and I don’t know how much longer I can last.”

“And so your solution is to have me fuck you?” Zayn asks, humoring Liam with feigned seriousness. Inside he’s laughing his arse off.

“Well, yeah, I mean,” Liam says, then pauses to take in a heavy breath. “I love her, yeah? We’ve been together for over two years, and I don’t want to break up with her on cheat on her with another girl. So yeah, I mean, it’s not like we haven’t done stuff… And it’s not like I can ask you to let _me_ fuck _you._ ”

“And what makes you think I’d want to even fuck you, you pretentious bastard?” Zayn inquires, his voice free of offense as a fond smile plays on his lips. Liam blinks, staring at him blankly before raising eyebrows that scream his disbelief.

“You don’t?” Liam asks, trying to hide his smirk. “So I take it the boner you have right now isn’t because I asked you to fuck me?”

Zayn’s not sure what Liam means until he looks down and, “Shit…” He hadn’t even noticed when that happened; the wonders Liam has managed to work on him. “You bastard,” Zayn mutters, looking up to see Liam grinning.

“So is that a yes?” Liam asks, head bowed shyly as he looks up through his lashes. Zayn can hear how hopeful and unsure Liam sounds of Zayn’s answer, and if his heart swells and does backflips at it all, then it’s not for Liam to know. It’s just a bit interesting to see Liam look so vulnerable when up until this point, he’s been the one to take charge during all of their sexual adventures.

“You’re lucky I love you,” is all Zayn mumbles before Liam launches himself at Zayn, wrapping him in his arms to pick him up and swing him around in an overly excited hug.

“Thank you so much,” Liam squeals, kissing Zayn wetly on the cheeks before putting him down, taking his hand, and leading him back inside of the party they’ve long since forgotten. They receive a couple of curious glances and questions from their friends gathered, but Liam answers them all in a rush, saying there’s not enough drinks here, they’re going out, no, we’ll be fine, no you should stay here and enjoy yourself we’ll be fine.

Finally, they make it out and Liam’s quick to hail a cab, pushing Zayn into the backseat as soon as it pulls to a stop. Liam gives the cabbie Zayn’s address, and once they start driving, Liam surprises Zayn by attaching his lips against Zayn’s in a hungry kiss. Zayn doesn’t even have enough time or air or _desire_ to pull away and ask Liam what all this is for, but in the back of his mind he figures that Liam just wants to have the full experience and get worked up properly, before Zayn decides to stop thinking and gives himself in to the kiss.

They’ve never actually kissed each other properly before, so it’s all new and awkward, much like their other newly discovered activities. Liam furthers it by moving to sit on Zayn’s lap, and the tension Liam’s bum has over Zayn’s restrained cock feels so good, Zayn can’t help but thrust his hips upwards. Liam moans at the thrust, and as his mouth is open, Zayn quickly slides his tongue in, causing Liam’s moan to soften into a whimper.

Liam’s mouth is all heat and wetness, and Zayn explores all he can with his tongue, wrapping it against Liam’s own before he curls it upward and slides it along the roof of Liam’s mouth. In his grasp, Zayn can feel Liam shiver at the sensation, so he does it again, a bit more firm, and suddenly Liam’s pulling away to catch his breath.

Zayn opens his eyes to find Liam staring down at him, dark eyes blown wide as heavy breaths are inhaled through his mouth, past his puffy red lips. Zayn shakes his head slightly, unable to resist, and leans up to capture Liam’s bottom lip between his own, biting down and pulling it back a bit before letting it loose, only to run his tongue over it soothingly.

They resume making out for the rest of the trip before the cab parks in the drive and Liam breaks the kiss once again, if only so slightly, to blindly pay the cabbie with a rather generous tip and eagerly leading Zayn into his house. Once they’re in the house, Zayn slams Liam into the door, desperate to have his lips back on Liam’s.

Zayn likes it, kissing Liam, and though they haven’t said a word to one another since the party, Zayn’s sure Liam likes it, too. It’s different than kissing with Perrie, much rougher, that’s for sure. But there’s something else in it, too. It’s a lot more passionate, Zayn wants to say, but he’s not sure that if doing so, it’d lead him to explore new possibilities and meanings behind it and their relationship. Friendship, Zayn means. He’s only fucking Liam because he’s a good friend.

Quickly, a good five minutes are wasted as they snog each other like the world is ending (and it’s not, because Liam gave Zayn an end-of-the-world handjob on the 21st, and a ‘congratulations, we survived the apocalypse’ blowjob the day after), which only makes Zayn kiss harder at the memory and realize no time spent kissing Liam is time wasted. Though, they have a reason for being here, and kissing is not the objective at hand, however nice it is. Reluctantly, Zayn pulls away, biting his swollen lips as he looks at Liam. “Bed?”

At first, Liam seems confused, then realization hits and he’s hastily nodding his head, locking lips with Zayn again and pulling him back, leading the way to Zayn’s bedroom.

They stumble in the room with no coordination, only stopping when they meet the bed, Liam falling backwards and bringing Zayn tumbling on top of him. Absently, Zayn straddles Liam’s hips, working his own down to grind against Liam’s clothed erection. Liam moans appropriately, before placing firm hands on Zayn’s hips to hold him in place.

“I thought--I thought _I_ was the one being fucked?” Liam asks breathlessly, and oh, that’s right, Zayn _is_ here to fuck Liam. He completely forgot, and he feels a little bit disappointed that Liam remembered and prevented it from going that way, before realizing that no, Zayn’s not gay, why does he care how Liam’s hard dick feels between his ass?

“Right,” Zayn says after he regains his senses, nodding erratically before sliding off Liam’s lap. As he gets up, he takes his top off and goes to unbutton his jeans before Liam is swatting his hand away.

Zayn doesn’t even have time to ask why Liam isn’t letting him undress as Liam undoes his zipper and slides the waistband of his boxers down to free his cock. Once it’s out, he grips it firmly in one of his hands before he slides the rest of Zayn’s pants and boxers down to his ankles. He gets up and positions Zayn to sit on the edge of the bed, before lowering himself to his knees on the floor and without warning, he takes Zayn’s length into his mouth.

Zayn can’t help but buck his hips up at the contact, which Zayn now realizes, his dick has become quite familiar with Liam’s mouth. Liam sucks Zayn off valiantly, with tight lips and a delicate tongue. When he pulls off, Zayn’s dick is left hard and pulsing, slick wet with Liam’s spit. Liam admires it proudly before Zayn tugs on Liam’s hair to pull him up towards the bed, kissing him fervently.

Blindly, Zayn kicks his shoes off before toeing himself out of tangle around his ankles, all while he’s unbuttoning Liam’s shirt in effort to shed all clothes as quick as possible. Once both boys are completely naked, Zayn leans Liam back down on the bed, exchanging soft, languid kisses as they let their hands roam over one another’s naked bodies.

Zayn’s hands explore all Liam has to offer, from the abs Zayn admires so much to his chest, where Zayn’s fingers run over Liam’s chest hairs and over Liam’s nipples, which harden at the contact. With a pinch, Liam’s moaning into Zayn’s mouth, bucking his hips up and making Zayn’s cock slide between Liam’s arse. At that, Liam stops kissing and Zayn pulls up, both making sense of the feel of Zayn’s cock between Liam’s cheeks. It’s nice, it really is, tight and firm and Zayn just has to fuck him, _now._

Liam appears to understand and agree, because he grinds his hips again and lets out a whimpered plea.

“Zayn, please, I need--I need you in me,” Liam begs, his hips moving restlessly. Zayn nods in agreement, quickly reaching across to his bedside table and pulling a tube of lube out from the drawer. He slicks his fingers up before spreading Liam’s legs even further apart, and looking down, Zayn whimpers at the sight of Liam spread out before him, ready and waiting _for_ Zayn’s eagerly twitching dick. Biting down on his bottom lip, he circles a finger around Liam’s hole, amused at the way Liam clenches in anticipation.

When Liam pushes his hips down impatiently, Zayn figures he’s had enough teasing (besides, he’s just as excited to do this, now, too). He pushes his forefinger in past the tight ring, instantly feeling it close around it tightly. Liam moans all throughout it, and Zayn waits patiently as Liam adjusts to the stretch. Quickly, he works a second finger in and scissors him open, followed by a third to ensure he’s stretched wide enough to take him. After the third finger, Liam decides he’s loosened enough and begs Zayn to just fuck him already. Zayn smiles, more than eager.

“Do you--do you have a, a condom?” Liam struggles between breathes, and fuck, Zayn doesn’t, but at this point he’s sure as hell that won’t stop either of them.

“No,” Zayn says, shaking his head as he lines his dick against Liam’s hole nonetheless. “I’ve never done this before,” Zayn explains. “I’m still a virgin, too.”

Liam eyes him curiously (or as much as he can through half-lidded eyes) in temporary disbelief before he gives in, nodding to Zayn. “I trust you,” he whispers, and spreads his legs open to let Zayn in. Zayn feels something in his heart at those words, so simple yet so powerful. It isn’t just trusting him to fuck him without a condom, or fucking him in general, but simply _trusting_ him completely and readily to take care of him and not hurt him. Those three words wash over him, overpowering his senses as he experiences something more than basic horniness. Instead, he feels intense passion, because those three words are so close in meaning to three other words. But Zayn doesn’t want to dwell on those possibilities, so instead he slicks up his length and aligns it against Liam’s stretched hole.

“Just go,” Liam whispers, and Zayn can hear the worry in his voice, so he leans down and presses a completely unnecessary kiss against Liam’s lips, whispers a reassurance that it’s gonna be okay, and kisses him again as he pushes himself in.

Liam moans in discomfort, so Zayn distracts him by plunging his tongue into Liam’s open mouth, and Liam immediately responds, giving Zayn time to go balls deep. Once all the way in, he stills, waiting for Liam to stop clenching around his dick in discomfort and to get used to the sensations.

It only takes a minute, and then Liam promptly _begs_ him to start moving, says he’s ready, and so Zayn does, slowly at first.

Once he starts moving, thrusting slow and shallowly into his best friend, does he realize the sensation it’s causing him. Like Liam’s mouth, it’s all wet, but intensely hot and so damn tight and oh, Zayn feels as though Liam’s ass were made for Zayn’s dick. After all, it does fit quite nicely.

He pulls out, only the head remaining in, before he thrusts back in completely, his dick rubbing against Liam’s prostate, making Liam moan loudly and beg for Zayn to do it again. Zayn does, repeatedly, gaining speed and momentum with each thrust. Somehow while pounding erratically in to Liam, he’s able to open his eyes to see Liam laid out beneath him, writhing all over, his head tossing and turning as his hands dig in to the bedspread, his legs wrapped tightly around Zayn’s waist, guiding him in eagerly. Zayn has become well acquainted with a not-so-innocent looking Liam, but this tops it all, and it’s so dirty and fucking sexy how filthy yet vulnerable he looks right now.

In the distance, he hears fireworks go off in celebration of the new year. Zayn smiles, as they’re going out with a bang.

He looks down, watches as his cock moves in and out of Liam’s hole, all fluid and smooth and it feels so good. He sees Liam’s cock, though, lying neglected across Liam’s stomach, bobbing about with each thrust. He decides quickly that if he’s going to help Liam lose his virginity, then he’s going to be pleasured on all accounts, and so he removes one hand from Liam’s thighs and wraps it around Liam’s flushed cock. The response is immediate, Liam clenching hard around Zayn’s cock, both men gasping. Zayn’s eyes flutter shut as he works his hand along Liam’s shaft, jerking it.

It only took a few more jerks and twists before Liam was spilling into Zayn’s hands with Zayn’s name on his lips. His hole clenched impossibly tight around Zayn’s dick, and the pressure as well as Liam screaming Zayn’s name was enough to send Zayn over the edge, trusting in deep one last time before releasing himself deep inside his friend, Liam’s name being pulled from his own lips. He rode their orgasms out, both boys chanting each other’s names with ragged breaths, as Zayn continued to trust shakily into Liam and jerk him off with unsteady hands.

Once they were both down from their highs, Zayn collapsed on top of Liam, breathless and fatigued. With as much effort as he could muster, he pulled out of Liam’s hole, feeling his come slide out with it, and laid himself down beside Liam.

For a moment, the only sounds was their heavy breathing, their naked, sweaty chests heaving up and down.

“Fuck,” Zayn manages, completely dazed and wholly satisfied.

“You said it,” Liam murmurs, turning on his side to snuggle against Zayn, resting on top of Liam’s open arm, his head in the nook of Zayn’s neck.

“So,” Zayn begins, holding his breath and feeling incredibly small and unconfident, “how was it?”

Liam huffs a laugh. “Mental,” Liam says. “You were bloody amazing, brilliant.”

“Yeah?” Zayn asks, biting his lip nervously.

“Yeah,” Liam replies, raising to press a chaste kiss on Zayn’s lips, in effect offering Zayn all the reassurance he needed. “Thanks, Zayn.”

“Anytime,” Zayn says before he can stop himself, then realizing he genuinely means it. Liam chuckles a throaty laugh.

“You know,” he says, yawning, “they say that whatever you’re doing at midnight of the new year is what you’ll be doing for the rest of the year.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy new year, may we have more ziam and even more ziam smut in 2013 (: x
> 
> comments & feedback/suggestions for future chapters are appreciated x


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zayn looks so beautiful when he sleeps, and it makes Liam really horny. Birthday sex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Partially inspired by [this](http://24.media.tumblr.com/6450b2c3639ea69eeced5f0614b9a9a4/tumblr_mghkg9PGNu1qak2v1o1_500.jpg) picture.
> 
> This chapter is more emotional than sexual, I think. The feelings are heartfelt and I felt that, simply by writing, I was intruding on a very private moment. Read with caution and fap with mirth.
> 
> Happy birthday, Zayn!

They fuck three more times.

Each time is better than the last, and that's something considering the first time was spectacular, but every time they do it again they become more familiar with one another, more comfortable and confident.

If only Danielle knew how her boyfriend was spending his off hours. But it's really hard to think (or care) about her when Zayn is pounding his sweet spot just right.

Still, as great as it is sleeping with Zayn, it isn't enough. Liam wants… more… and he doesn't realize what more he wants until he's staring down at Zayn, sleeping, after one of their fucks.

Zayn always falls asleep afterwards, sprawled out naked, exhausted and content. Liam hasn't said as much, but he looks forward to those moments, because during the act they're both at their most vulnerable, but Zayn prolongs his until he wakes up the next morning.

He looks so open, so free and innocent, as if they weren't fooling around with each other while they both still had girlfriends. He looks so… Zayn… and it makes Liam so damn horny.

It happened, a few days ago, Zayn had fallen asleep after a magnificently good fuck, completely spent, but Liam remained awake, lying next to him. Zayn, still naked, had shifted in his sleep and burrowed himself into Liam's side. Cuddling, Liam decided then, was quite nice, naked or not. Except, Zayn _moaned_ in his sleep, into Liam's side, and the sound went straight to Liam's cock.

He wanked himself right after that, with Zayn sleeping right beside him, and he doesn't think he's ever been more turned on.

Liam wants to fuck Zayn, while he's sleeping.

"You want to _what?_ " Zayn asks, wide eyed and alarmed, subconsciously closing his legs at the mere mention of Liam's proposal.

"Well, you've been fucking me --"

"But Li, I'm not _gay,_ " Zayn says, cutting him off. Liam frowns, because he's not gay either, even if he does quite enjoy Zayn's dick up his arse, or wish they could switch. It isn't like Liam thinks that way for any other guys, or any of his other bandmates, because he doesn't -- just Zayn. He's not sure what that means.

"Neither am I," Liam reminds him, then continues. "It's just, why can't you? I bottom for you."

"Yeah, but Liam, you're always the one asking to do stuff."

"I didn't last night," Liam says, and Zayn flushes. It was Liam fault, really, making Zayn horny to the point where Zayn would want to ravage him roughly. It worked, and as soon as they were out of the studio, Zayn plowed Liam into his bed. "And why wouldn't you want to? It's great, okay, I promise. _I_ like it."

Zayn purses his lips, but otherwise stays silent. Liam grins, he has it in the bag.

"Just think of how good it feels to make me feel good, yeah?" Liam says, smiling coyly as he crawls across the bed, straddling Zayn's lap. They're both fully clothed, much to Liam's displeasure, but if he can get Zayn to say yes then it'll be well worth it. "You'll feel even _better_ if you let me take care of you."

Zayn sighs, and Liam knows he's won.

"Fine," Zayn says. "But just once, and only 'cause it's you."

Liam grins happily. "Who else would it be?"

Zayn sticks his tongue out at him, and Liam surprises him by taking it into his mouth for a quick kiss. They've gotten better at that, too, and are now enjoying them outside of their sex. Something fun, something intimate, something to share just between the two of them. It's a much different kiss than he shares with Danielle; with Zayn, there's a fiery intensity, a need burning underneath all the mutual want. Liam thinks it's passion. He suspects Zayn does, too.

Now that Zayn's said yes… there's only one thing left to clear up.

"But," Liam says, pulling back and biting his lip. There's really no easy way to say you want to fuck your straight best friend for the first time while he's asleep. He does it anyway. "I want to do it when you're asleep."

Zayn cocks an eyebrow in surprise, but stays silent, waiting for Liam to explain.

"I think you're really hot when you're asleep," Liam says, bending back down to ghost his lips over Zayn's, staring him in the eyes. "Or adorable, which makes it even sexier, and you have no idea how horny you make me, sleeping naked right next to me after you fuck me."

"But then I wouldn't remember it…" Zayn mumbles, and that does something to Liam's heart because even if Zayn's cautious about being fucked, he _wants_ to be able to remember Liam doing that to him. He can't help but smile affectionately at that, rewarding him with a grateful kiss.

"Maybe not, but you'll feel it?" For a moment, Zayn is expressionless, contemplating his decision, but then he nods his head slowly, a smile curling on his lips.

"Alright, fine then," he says. "But I get to decide when we do it."

 

 

Zayn picked his birthday, saying something about always wanting to have birthday sex. It was agreed though, that since Zayn would be asleep when Liam fucks him, that that evening they'd switch, and Liam would bottom for him.

Liam had no complaints.

Liam's excited for tonight, though, and because he doesn't want Zayn waking up, he's made sure he's taken a few sleeping pills. Despite the fact that Zayn can (and likely would) sleep through the apocalypse, Liam doesn't want to take any chances for things to go wrong. After all, with the experience he has in bottoming, he doesn't think he'd be able to sleep through the steady sensations of a throbbing cock being pounded against his prostate.

By agreement (though Liam really wouldn't have it any other way), they lay in bed together until Zayn falls asleep. An hour after, Zayn is passed out cold. Liam continues to cuddle him close for half an hour longer until Zayn tries to bury his head into the crook of Liam's neck.

It's so adorable, and it makes Liam so fucking horny.

Time to get this birthday party on the road.

If Zayn isn't going to be awake to remember this, then Liam has to capture it for him. He untangles himself from Zayn's limbs and crawls out of bed, grabbing his phone. He snaps a quick picture of Zayn lying peacefully on his bed, and while his heart (and his dick) swells twice its size, tweets it to Zayn with a happy birthday.

Now time for the present.

He sets his phone on the mantle of the fireplace, ensuring it has a good view of the bed, and hits _Record._ Then, he makes his way over to the bed, eager to get started.

He presses a few soft kisses to Zayn's unresponsive lips before snaking an arm around his back to lift him up a bit and ease his hoodie off. Once that's discarded, he lets his eyes travel the expanse of Zayn's bare chest, his fingers roaming over familiar trails, tracing familiar paths of Zayn's tattoos.

Liam marvels the sight, but soon the urge to _taste_ becomes overwhelming and he gives in, not really putting up much of a fight. He bends, peppering kisses along Zayn's jaw and down his neck, before reaching Zayn's shoulder blade and over his pecks. His mouth hovers over one of Zayn's nipples, and at one moment it's a kiss, the next, a lick. Soon he's sucking softly, scraping his teeth over the nub until it responds in his mouth, transforming from soft to hard and perk.

Zayn may be sleeping soundly, but he's responding all the same, and Liam smiles when he hears Zayn's even breathing turn rugged.

Liam eases himself up off Zayn, not without placing an open mouthed kiss on both nipples, and begins to trail his tongue down the insides of Zayn's ribs, over his belly button, and down his happy trail. Being met with Zayn's pajama bottoms, Liam rises, placing his hand over Zayn's soft cock.

Zayn doesn't respond to Liam's touch, and though Liam feels a twinge of annoyance at that, he's quick to look up at Zayn's sleeping state to remind himself that yes, he wants this, so bad.

With one arm, he raises Zayn's legs at the bend in his knees, and with the other, does the same to his waist, and then proceeds to slide Zayn's bottoms and underwear off.

Zayn lies before him, naked and ready, and it's all so familiar to Liam but this is so dramatically different, because now he gets to do so much more than _look_ and wank alone beside him.

He can't wait.

His head returns to Zayn's crotch, and he can't help it, really, his mouth has a brain of its own (one it shares with his dick), and he lets his tongue swipe against the length of Zayn's soft cock before taking it into his mouth, easily sucking him to the base.

There's nothing he can compare to how much he loves doing this, not even singing. Nothing makes him more happy or pleased than what he shares with Zayn. They both make one another happy during their activities, ensure that by the time they're finished, both parties are left pleased and completely satisfied. They take care of one another, their needs and all, and never do they have to verbalize what those needs are. They just know, and they respond to them appropriately.

It's intimate, what they have, in a manner that he hasn't shared with anyone else, in a way he _doesn't_ want to share with others. He likes what he has going with Zayn, even if it confuses him at times, but he doesn't want to stop and figure things out. When he's with Zayn, Zayn treats him right, and that's all that matters. Together, in private, they can forget about the world or their friends (or their girlfriends), and just be _Zayn and Liam._

They know each other like no one else, and Liam can't imagine a better best friend than Zayn, and he can't help but wonder as Zayn's dick begins to swell in his mouth, if Liam were gay, how would it change or affect their relationship? Would they have what they have now? Would it be just their friendship, or would there be a sexual relationship going on?

He doesn't even dare think of romantic possibilities. He's afraid, that if he does, he'll end up distressed, coming to the inevitable realization that no, what they're doing isn't what straight friends with loving girlfriends do.

But no -- Liam doesn't want to focus on that right now. Instead, he'd much rather focus on how soft and warm Zayn's cock feels in his mouth right now, or how it tastes just a bit salty, and it smells like the cologne and body wash Liam gave him for Christmas.

It's all so _Zayn_ that Liam's mouth waters anew.

Liam's jaw is starting to ache, and he realizes he's probably spent a good ten minutes letting his mouth make love to Zayn's dick. He'd say something vulgar like sucking or fucking, but he can't, because it doesn't feel that way. To be honest, it never has before, not completely. There's so much compassion in what they do with one another, the both of them always checking to see if the other is okay with what they're doing. It's emotional, and that makes what their share, as well as their sex, that much more intense.

They love each other, they do; they're best friends, they care deeply about one another. That same love and care doesn't go out the window when they're in bed together; they don't resort to their primal animalistic instincts and ravage each other with the single minded purpose of getting off and letting go. They _both_ get each other off, and they stay together until they _need_ to go.

When it comes to them and what they do, they're never in a hurry. They check to make sure the other's needs are met and pleased before they consider their own. That type of thoughtfulness is rare in most circumstances, for other people, but not Zayn and Liam, who exhibits such traits to one another on a daily basis.

Easing off Zayn's dick, he gives it a few more licks before placing a kiss on the head, then all the way down the shaft where he reaches Zayn's balls. He tries to capture both in his mouth, but they won't fit, so he tugs at one and rolls it with his tongue.

Next, he's pulling Zayn down further on the bed, so that Liam is now rested on the floor on his knees, and places both of Zayn's legs over his shoulders. Raising Zayn's hips, Liam lowers his head and swipes his tongue against Zayn's entrance.

It's just like the rest of Zayn, really, just more intense. It's less subtle, but not at all overpowering. Liam offers it a few more licks before he tries to push his tongue in past the ring of muscle.

Even though Liam's never had sex with a conscious Zayn before, he's certain Zayn is reacting differently than he normally would. In his sleep, his responses are all subconscious, which makes Liam giggle -- _giggle --_ when Zayn's hole twitches at the sensation.

Liam's familiar with the sensation, though, understanding with firsthand experience that it means he's ready, expectant and needy. Liam replaces his tongue with a finger, one he slicks by prying Zayn's mouth open and having him suck on it unknowingly. Once Zayn starts grinding his teeth against his finger, he pulls it away, feeling a little betrayed by Zayn's mouth.

He circles his finger around Zayn's hole and watches, fascinated, as it disappears inside Zayn. The heat is intense and Liam's cock twitches excitedly, eager to have that same heat engulf it. Liam fingers Zayn slowly, adding another finger after three or so minutes, stretching his fingers apart or curling them together to stretch Zayn into preparation. When he has three fingers in, he pushes in deep enough to rub against Zayn's prostate, and it makes him so happy to see Zayn's mouth fall open at the contact, brows furrowed as if not understanding why he feels so good during the middle of one of his dreams.

Liam smiles, then decides Zayn's ready. He pulls his fingers out and wipes them against his jeans, only realizing then that he's yet to shed his own clothing. He does just that, eyes glued on the boy lying in wait before him, his prize at the end of the day, one he'll cherish for all time.

He pushes Zayn further up on the bed then lowers himself on top of him, kissing his way into Zayn's mouth, uncaring if Zayn's subconscious responds without much enthusiasm. It's Zayn, and after all of Liam's kinks, that's really all that matters, all he finds important. At the end of the day, Zayn's still there for Liam when he needs him most, sexually or not.

Liam's hips are grinding in between Zayn's legs, and he's happy to note that he can feel Zayn's erection digging into his abdomen. It's semi-hard, but he got it from Liam, in his _sleep._ Liam feels incredibly proud.

With gentle hands -- always gentle, because Zayn treats him delicate, Liam doesn't see why he shouldn't do the same with similar appreciation -- he spreads Zayn's thighs, wrapping them behind his back. He lifts Zayn's hips and places a pillow underneath before he aligns his neglected cock at Zayn's entrance.

They ran out of lube during the last time, and neither have had time to replace it. Liam would've moistened his dick by having Zayn suck him off, but in Zayn's sleeping state, Liam feels it'd be way too wrong and overstepping. His own mouth is fully functional, however, and though he doesn't feel like sucking himself off now (Zayn had said, one day, that Liam had the most amazing lips and wished Liam could experience it himself, noting that Liam's dick was big enough that he could suck himself off, but Liam's yet to try that), he has ample amounts of saliva available. He spits into his hand and uses it to slick his cock up before he pushes the head in past the opening.

He would have used a condom, but Zayn said it was only fair that, since Zayn has never used one, Liam wouldn't either. Zayn decided that if Liam were going to top, he was going to experience it just as good as he does.

Zayn's entire body tenses at the intrusion, but relaxes just a second later, due to Liam stilling. Slowly, Liam eases himself in, thrusting shallowly, burying himself deeper with each thrust. Once he's in completely, he lowers himself down, pressing his body flush against Zayn, desperately needing to be that much closer to him.

It's amazing, feeling Zayn wrapped around him, clenching subconsciously to familiarize himself with being full. Liam looks down at him, sees Zayn's face contorted in confusion, his features unsure of whether to display a pained or pleasured face.

Liam kisses him, softly, on the lips, and brings a hand up to caress Zayn's face, smoothing the worry away.

Liam's glad he asked Zayn to take his virginity; he's glad that Zayn accepted it. Liam trusts Zayn completely, and Zayn has taken care of the gift Liam honored him with. Right now, as he starts moving within Zayn, he feels the honor turn, as he realizes he's taking Zayn's virginity now, too.

Liam has to physically bite back the guilt when he realizes that, though he's taking Zayn's virginity, Zayn isn't conscious to enjoy it. Hopefully, the video will suffice, though Liam knows it won't.

But that, that makes it much more intense, right? That Zayn would simply give himself up to Liam, without a second thought to how he'd want his virginity taken, or who should take it. Zayn allowed Liam to settle his desires instead, and now, as Liam's beginning to moan, his heart clenches tightly.

It's suffocating, really, thinking about all of this, about _them._ If Zayn were awake, it'd be much different; Liam would be distracted by their collected moans and whispers that he wouldn't be caught up appreciating him, or considering their relationship.

Zayn's whimper pulls Liam out of his reverie. Liam smiles, because Zayn's responding in his sleep, and a glance between their stomachs reveals Zayn's neglected cock, dripping with pre-come.

Liam thrusts deeper, still softly, focused on pleasing Zayn more, dedicated to making him come untouched.

Zayn shifts, tossing and turning in his sleep from the disturbance Liam's providing, and then he sleep talks.

"Ah, so good, yeah," he mumbles, still asleep. His face scrunches up. "Ha-- harder, please."

Liam nods, knowing Zayn can't see him, and fastens his pace, his thrusts becoming rougher with each snap of the hips until he's hitting Zayn's prostate, and Zayn shivers beneath him before writhing in pleasure.

Liam can't take much more of seeing Zayn's scrunched face tossing from side to side, so he lowers and presses repeated kisses against Zayn's mouth, the closer contact causing his stomach to grind across Zayn's dick with each thrust. The added friction makes Zayn come shortly after, and Liam continues to thrust into him, relishing on how much tighter Zayn gets as he shoots his load between them.

Liam separates himself, still humping into Zayn, and lowers his hand to scoop up a glob of Zayn's spunk before inserting them into his mouth, sucking happily on Zayn's sweet taste. Once Zayn comes down from his high, he looks dazed, completely pleased, and still asleep, though murmuring in his sleep.

"Li-- ah," Zayn says, then hisses subconsciously when Liam hits that spot again. "I love you, Liam."

It catches Liam completely off guard, and he begins to come uncontrollable as he thrusts inward, nearly collapsing due to the unexpected suddenness. He stills, as painfully as it is considering he's still coming, and struggles to keep his eyes open as he stares at Zayn in open shock.

Zayn's still asleep, beneath him, looking dishelved but entirely satisfied, unknowing of how his admission has affected Liam.

Liam pulls out once he feels confident enough in his limbs, looking completely horrified. He feels disgusted, not at Zayn for loving him, but at himself for allowing this to happen.

It isn't that he doesn't fancy the idea of Zayn loving him, because he does, they've had sex too many times for him to deny that possibility. It's the fact that Zayn admitted it despite himself, completely unaware and unintentional, and won't remember the words he let slip.

But Liam will, and that really isn't fair, because Zayn's admission forced him into thinking, and accepting, all of the various possibilities and thoughts he'd been trying to suppress since they started doing whatever it is that they're doing.

It can't continue.

He gets himself out of bed and does a walk of shame towards his cell phone, stopping the recording. This is one video Zayn won't be seeing. He gets a wash cloth and wets it before returning to the bed, gently cleaning the come off and out of Zayn.

Once done, he gets back in bed, tries to sleep on the far side, but Zayn snuggles in close to him, throwing an arm across Liam's torso and resting his head on Liam's chest, the traces of a content smile on his lips.

With silent tears and a tight grip on Zayn, Liam cries himself to sleep, wondering when it stopped being just sex.

It's only in his dream that he admits, "I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, remember when I said this story had a plot? Well, it's starting now, so please don't hate me for the amount of angst in this chapter (and possibly the next few ones).


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Zayn's birthday sex has caused a riff in Zayn and Liam's relationship. Liam avoids Zayn and both boys take comfort in their girlfriends, both of whom they've managed to neglect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so warnings this chapter includes het sex and i'm so sorry but i promise you that as a gay male it was more awkward for me to write than it will be for you to read.
> 
> also, all throughout the sex (if you can call it that; you can judge) zayn is thinking of liam.
> 
> many thanks to everyone who assisted me on the knowledge and secrets on how vagina's work, and special thanks to my best friend abagail for not judging me when i asked her what boobs feel like. 
> 
> this chapter is more comedy than sexual, i think. enjoy (with a laugh, not a wank).

Something's changed after Zayn's birthday, and he isn't sure what it was. All he knows is, the next day, he woke up feeling sore, with the muscle memory of _Liam_ still filling his senses. It was oddly pleasant.

Then he rolled over to find the bed empty.

Since then, and Zayn would like to pretend he's just imagining things or that it's been pure coincident, Liam's been avoiding him. Whenever Zayn would try to talk to him, something casual and friendly, Liam would make a hurried excuse and run off.

Normally, Zayn would downplay it and not let it affect him, but then Liam started to hang out with Danielle more, and it struck Zayn as odd because usually, of late, he'd loathe her company and prefer Zayn's.

But now things have changed and Zayn isn't sure what has, exactly. He suspects it has something to do with that night, but since he was asleep, he has no idea what it could've been. He can't even ask (or thank, because that was the greatest, most vivid sex dream Zayn has had in his life) Liam about it because Liam seems unable to stay in Zayn's presence without a third party being pulled in.

Eventually, about two weeks after, Zayn just gives up on trying to capture Liam's attention. If Liam is freaked out about whatever they had going, then fine; it was Liam's idea in the first place. If he's decided to end it, okay, he could've at least told Zayn first instead of avoiding him like the plague.

But alas, Liam just ditches Zayn for Danielle, and if Zayn has to go without his best friend then that's fine, too; he has a girlfriend of his own that he can pay attention to.

It's only now that he realizes how much he's neglected her ever since their Christmas holiday.

He calls her, plays nice boyfriend and asks her out for a night in the city, and she accepts immediately. The date goes fine; Zayn focuses his attention on her, willing himself to be happy and not let the thoughts flooding his mind dampen his mood.

By the end of the night, Zayn invites her home, no longer used to sleeping alone as he's been forced to for the past two weeks. He doesn't intend the gesture to be anything other than friendly, but Perrie interprets it as sexual, so it's to Zayn's surprise that when he steps out of the bathroom in nothing but his pajama bottoms and his toothbrush is working in and out of his mouth that his eyes bulge and he squawks, choking on his toothbrush as his gaze lands on a very naked Perrie, lying in what Zayn thinks she thinks is a seductive manner.

His eyes scan her body on their own accord, taking in the way her hair falls down to her shoulders, how her breasts draping loose with pert nipples, down her lithe torso to her belly button, where Zayn discovers with disappointment that there is no trail of fine dark hairs that lead to her manicured loins.

Zayn sighs inwardly when he doesn't find the ten inch penis he's become so infatuated with recently.

He turns on his heels and pedals back into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He spits the paste out of his mouth and gargles some water. He grips the marble countertop with both hands to steady his shaking knuckles, and tries to breathe deeply.

She wants this; she wants sex. She wants _Zayn._  

But does Zayn want her?

Of course he does, he thinks a second later. He stares at his reflection in the mirror. She's his _girlfriend._ Of course he wants her, and she wants him, so what is he waiting for?

A voice in the back of his head (and the bottom of his heart) whispers _Liam_ , but no -- that can't be true. The thing with Liam was because their girlfriends weren't interested. Now they are, and now Zayn is ready.

He nods his head to his reflection with resolve, and after taking a deep breath, he walks back out the bathroom and into his room. Perrie is off the bed and by the dresser, slipping into a slim silk rope, icy blue, just like her eyes. She looks so small and insecure, and it puzzles Zayn for a moment.

"Wait, what's wrong?" Zayn asks, confused.

Perrie looks sheepish and sad. "I thought you didn't want --"

"No, I did," Zayn says, before mentally kicking himself. "I mean, I do, just not while I'm brushing my teeth."

Perrie smiles, not completely reassured, so Zayn walks to her and smooches her until she relaxes. He walks her backwards to the bed, and when the back of his knees hit the bed, he falls over, bringing Perrie down on top of him.

They both giggle, and Perrie moves to straddle him. Zayn lets his hands travel up her hairless arms and to her small shoulders where he takes her robe, and together they undress her.

As the robe falls free, Zayn's met once again with Perrie's breasts, this time much more in his face. Perrie doesn't waste time to take Zayn's hands and press them against her bosom. They're round, soft and supple to the touch, not flat, firm and smooth.

As she presses his hands against her breasts with more force, squeezing his palm against them, Zayn can't help but think he has to stop thinking of Liam.

So he rises up to flip them over, earning a giggle from her that's silenced when Zayn goes to kiss her, uncomfortable with the high pitched voice she's giving; foreign to Zayn's blood-rushed ears.

He kisses her, struggling to remember what she liked, only able to perform the actions he's learned Liam enjoys, like when he brushes his tongue against the roof of Liam's mouth, or when he sucks on Liam's tongue and bites it playfully. He can't remember for the life of him what Perrie prefers, but with how she's responding to the kiss, she seems to enjoy it enough.

Perrie wraps her legs around Zayn's waist to pull him closer, scratching his back in the process. Her manicured nails dig in deep, making Zayn hiss. Perrie's hands have already made it to the waistband of Zayn's pajama bottoms, and she tries tugging them down. Zayn breaks the kiss and pulls them off, then settles on his heels. Perrie bends and wraps her small hand around Zayn's member and then puts the head in her mouth.

Her mouth is dry and not nearly hot enough. It's a disappointment all around, but Zayn bits down on his tongue to not protest it; he can't very well explain how he prefers it, as she still thinks of him as a virgin.

Zayn smirks, guiltily.

Perrie's horrible at giving blowjobs. Zayn should've known, considering she has a problem with swallowing large things, but this is ridiculous. He pulls her off just enough to lay down, and she moves around and goes back to work on slicking his cock up with her tongue.

Perrie is obviously inexperienced, and Zayn should, be, too, so he decides to cut her some slack and maybe if they're able to repeat this, in about three tries he'll give her some suggestions.

Until then, though, and if he has any chance on getting himself hard the way Perrie clearly intends on making him, then he can't rely on her mouth. Luckily for him, he has a surplus of memories to work on, the same memories he's found himself wanking over in attempt to relive the moments.

He completely ignores Perrie and her soft grip on his cock (despite her nails digging painfully into the base of his dick) and kitten licks and imagines Liam with his luscious lips and firm, calloused hand wrapped around his base and tugging on his balls. How Liam will hollow his cheeks and swirl his tongue at the head, breath down the underside vein, dragging his teeth along it then licking it up and sucking it down and --

" _Liam,_ " Zayn sighs, breathless and happy and _fuck._

Perrie stills and pulls off, sending Zayn a look equal parts hurt, curious, and angry.

"Liam, he ah--" Fuck, Zayn, _think._ "He told me this felt good, I just didn't think it'd feel this good."

Good save. Smooth.

Perrie stares at him a second longer before grinning, proudly, and abandoning his cock as she goes to kiss him. Zayn responds back eagerly, desperate for the taste of himself (or of dick in general) on her tongue. Once he can no longer taste himself as strongly, she pulls back and stares down at him, smiling, a silent statement that she's ready.

Zayn nods and flips them over, reaches over to his bedside drawer to pull out a thing of lube. He slicks his fingers up and goes to insert them where he's most familiar with, but Perrie stops him short.

"I don't think so," she says, taking his hand and directing it to her vagina. "I don't know what guys' fascination is with anal, but I'm not up for it, sorry, love."

Zayn huffs a fake laugh, his cheeks heating in embarrassment. "No, of course, sorry."

He kisses her quickly then looks down at her vagina and frowns. What is he supposed to do with this? He takes a quick breath and slide a finger in quickly, only for Perrie to yelp and hit him against the head.

"Ow, Zayn! The _other_ hole!"

And okay, _what?_ Perrie notices his confusion and gently directs Zayn's finger to her vaginal opening, then lets it go. Zayn pushes his finger in and shudders at the feeling he's met with.

Perrie's breath hitches in a whimper and Zayn has to physically push himself to keep his finger in despite how he's cringing. It's wet, so very wet, and a bit hot but it just feels so different and alien and _gross._

He's quick to loosen her up, scissoring and fingering her with well-practiced expertise that he's earned from his adventures with Liam.

Once he's deemed her loose enough to take him, he reaches over to get a condom, faintly realizing this would be the first time he's ever actually used one. Perrie lies beneath him in wait, dark eyes trained on Zayn's cock as he rolls on the condom, praying in the back of his mind that it'll shield him from the feeling his fingers experienced.

He lowers himself in, mentally kicking himself for watching as his penis slides in to her vagina as if it's eating it. He sucks his lips into his mouth and bites down on them to prevent him from crying out in disgust.

Once he's in balls deep, he feels Perrie clench around him, and he whimpers, bringing his head down to bury it over her shoulder, unable to look her in her eyes.

He thrusts, once, twice, three times, trying to find her prostate before he realizes she doesn't have one. Perrie is moaning in his ear, scratching at his back, and it frustrates Zayn completely because her voice isn't rough or gravelly or deep. It's high-pitched moans and sharp breath and soft skin smelling of strawberries.

It's not Liam.

He can't stop thinking about Liam, or comparing the two of them. Liam was his first, for everything sexual, and they've grown so close the past few months. Perrie is all different, all feminine and soft, something Zayn isn't used to and doesn't care to familiarize himself with.

As he continues to thrust into her, Perrie starts to chant Zayn's name, and he feels like he's cheating, just not on her.

The realization makes Zayn falter and suddenly, he can no longer do this. He pushes away from Perrie quickly and jumps out of bed, discarding the condom and dresses fast, leaving Perrie naked, dazed and confused and alone on the bed.

He can feel her burning gaze pointed at him, but he can't bear to look her in the eyes. They should probably talk about it, he should probably explain himself, but he can't.

He needs to talk to Liam, first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, i feel as though i need to explain myself, so i don't come off as insensitive towards the female anatomy.
> 
> after so much sex with liam, it's really all he knows, so he's unfamiliar with what the female body has to offer, and once he has it, it isn't what he expected. it's basically what would happen if a gay kid has sex with a woman. i hope you don't interpret it as me shaming the female body parts (though, i'll be honest: vagina's scare me but i find breasts beautiful in an artistic point of view).
> 
> i hope, despite the het (which i should be applauded for my efforts on this because i've never even seen het porn to write about it) that you enjoyed this chapter and at least laughed.
> 
> xx paradice


End file.
